He: Toast in Granite Bay

‘It’s soo soothing and pleasant that it makes me want to just kill myself. I want to die. I want to die. Kill me now!’ – Stan’s Grandfather on Southpark
This is the only real lasting impression that I took away from the experience of brunch at Toast in Granite Bay. Not to say that the meal was so heinous that I was asking people around me if they would kill me(although the idea of it may have motivated the waitstaff to life), but just that maybe if someone did try to kill me while I was dining at Toast I might just have more emotions to attach to the experience there. Let’s just say that I know enough about restaurants to know when someone truly knows what they’re doing and what they want to do, and when someone hopes that nobody really catches onto the fact that they really don’t have any idea and are just faking it until they can get to the point that they know that they know nothing. Toast gives me the distinct impression that they fall into the latter of these categories.

If there is anything that reading of many, many other blogsites have taught me...people loooove pictures.
I had a simple plate of over easy eggs with roasted red potatoes, honey ham and wheat toast. She had eggs benedict , more of those same red skin potatoes and a cinnamon roll that we both shared. I found just a couple of things to be a little off about my meal(but it's breakfast, it should be fantastic...it's not like it's a hard meal to cook). She, on the other hand, had all sorts of problems with what she got. My issues were potatoes that looked like they went right from the steamer to the plate....no color whatsoever. If you're really going to do such a travesty to potatoes as to cut them up and cook them to be eaten as pieces there should be come freaking CARAMELIZATION on them...otherwise just mash them. Her issues were VERY hard english muffins, poached eggs that should've just been hard boiled(since they were sooo well done), and completely BROKEN hollandaise(which I also thought was too spicy with tabasco). The only 2 things that I can honestly say that toast did well were a good cup of coffee, and an admirable attempt at a cinnamon bun.
What could possibly make me think that Toast is a place that is just trying to get its bearings and maybe try to make a run at figuring itself out? First there’s the complex that it’s a part of, Quarry Pond in Granite Bay. This is a strip mall that is created around the idea of copying the Ferry Building in San Francisco(I know this is the idea that they were going for, because I interviewed with the head chef of Toast that works directly for the owner of the whole complex), only not doing it as big, or with as many unique shops, or without really having the backing of being in a true food town. If you have been to both of these places, you have the opportunity to call me to the matt if you think that I’m completely off base on my assessment of this completely created, Starbucks ‘Venti Latte Culture’ sham of a concept.
The second big thing that makes me wonder what they hell they were thinking in their creation of Toast is the interior and overall design of the place. As soon as you walk in you will see a small bar, with a large flat screen TV and the host stand. As soon as SheChew and I walked in I noticed and incredible confluence of white logo’ed button up shirt, black slacks, blonde-dyed twentynothing female servers(all of whom looked like they wanted to be anywhere but there, spending as much of their parents’ money as they possibly could). For some strange reason(it certainly wasn’t the architecture or the tables, or the strange location of the kitchen) I thought of Bette’s Ocean View Diner in Berkley http://www.worldpantry.com/bettes/home.html . The similarities between Toast and Bette’s certainly stopped immediately after that first impression, and any big fans of the latter please let me apologize for mentioning a very good breakfast spot that has nice food executed by real cooks, in the same article with food prepared by Latinos that don’t have enough concern, or love of food to get the food right…..yet.
Okay it just occurred to me that this post is getting to the point of becoming amazingly long. If you’ve actually made it this far I commend you. Yes, at times I can be very negative towards the restaurant industry. I don’t think that my viewpoint is at all invalid, since I do have a very strong base in the hospitality industry itself. I think this base in hospitality affords me the space to make the comments that I do, and will continue to do. If restaurants in this area really want to become more like the bay area, where true, superior establishments exist, they really need to go back and reexamine how they are going about the concept of hospitality, and get outside of this exclusive idea that they’re there just to make money.